Smother Magazine Mailbag

Letters to the Editor

From time to time we get e-mails that we simply feel we must share with all of our readers.

To: J-Sin

From: 66.65.126.249

YOU FUCKED UP. YOUR MAILBAG SECTION IS EVIL. YOU HAVE A NICE FAMILY AND PRETTY BRUNETTE WIFE. YOU SHOULD ENJOY TIME WITH THEM RATHER THAN PUBLICLY HUMILIATING US. DESTROY THE MAILBAG OR BE PUBLIC EXPOSED FOR WHO YOU ARE. EVERYTHING DOWN TO THOSE PICTURES OF LONDON ON YOUR WALL. MY INFORMATION WILL SHOCK YOU. BELIEVE IT!

[Editor's note, this brazen individual did some Googling, (half-assed at best since he called me my son's name) apparantly didn't realize I capture all IP addresses and forward abusive notes to the FBI since Internet traffic crosses state lines. Then he followed up with another note, caps-lock, his.]

From: 24.199.121.200

WHAT I FELT TO BE UNFAIR IS NOW DONE AND OVERWITH. NO ILL FEELINGS. IT'S A JOB AND WITH THAT MUST COME A LEVEL OF RESPECT AND I HAVE THAT. THE MESSAGE I WAS TRYING TO SEND IS: JUST BECAUSE YOU HAVE INFORMATION DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD SHARE IT. I WILL TAKE THE HIGH ROAD AND LEAVE THIS ONE ALONE.

[Editor's note, clearly he's taken the high road, after one day's worth of contemplation.]

In response to this review we wrote

To: J-Sin

come on, you might not like the genre or the music for that matter, but don't try to push buttons by blowing steam at anyone who reads your articles. stick to straight reviews, you like it, why? you don't give me a reason why? i actually usually enjoy your straight forward approach and you reviews for that matter, but this one pushed me over the edge. From someone who has listened to the cd, i think you went too far. I will tell you that seeing the band live is a much better experience. You lose the over-produced/ touchy feel with the sound effects and stuff, and you get straight music- good music at that.

In response to this review we wrote

To: J-Sin

you guys are real ass holes
i want to crush that pric sin
please remove all reference to weakness from your web site

In response to this review we wrote

To: J-Sin

I'm writing to you about Emo Dagger's review. Did you actually take a look to see that Emo wrote/produced/arranged the full album himself? For being only 22, I think his album is incredible, and is geared towards a broad-commercial audience. As far as making fun of his name. Well, it's his real name. Why would you be-little someone because of that? You should be encouraging our new and talented artists, so that they can keep getting better at their craft, not putting negavity out there, just for your own amusement. I'm not here to judge you, but from the other reviews that you have made, it sounds like you are partial to rock and old classic sounding music that will never make it on radio. You should get someone who actually knows how to critique radio pop music. Emo's music is even better then most of the music out now, because he actually has positive things to say, not just always talking about sex, drugs, and yo mama.
Emo is the best thing to happen to myspace.
If you truly listen to what he has to say, you\'d probably enjoy him as we all do.


-A fan

In response to this review we wrote

To: Jeremy

Dear Sir / Madam,


I have just read your piece on Kaki King and am astonished to read the following "The guitar becomes a drum and its own band when Kaki's magical techinque goes to work on it."


I would like to know how you managed to mention Leo Kotkee and Michael Hedges but not Preston Reed. Kaki King was a student of Preston Reed, this is where she learnt the over the neck percussive technique she uses. If you did some research this would become obvious, she can also be heard on an NPR interview saying that she has basically ripped him off.


It would be nice to see you do a piece on Preston Reed, you can find out all about him at www.prestonreed.com


Looking forward to hearing from you,


Best wishes


Cath Maguire

In response to this review we wrote

To: J-Sin

Hi!

I would appreciate if you could remove your review for Widescreen Mode\'s \"Another Day\" EP (it was wrote Wide Screen Mode on your review headline). I think this review isn\'t even a good joke.

» Widescreen Mode
» Janne Aaltonen, drums
» http://www.widescreenmode.com

In response to this review we wrote

To: J-Sin

Dear J-Sin
Thanks for the nice review. We're so glad to hear you liked our approach - it's really encouraging. Not sure where you're situated, but just wanted to let you know we'll be doing a record release in NYC May 12. If you're in town and want to come by let us know and we'll put you on the list. We'll be touring this summer too so if not here perhaps we'll catch you out there.
Best wishes
Eben and Flying

In response to this review we wrote

To: J-Sin

do you realize that you have made all of the time that i made this album worth it. Your review made everything that i did have reason. Sometimes it takes another to show the value of what a person has created. When i get more then $5 dollars in my bank account, I will advertise in your magazine and show you my appreciation.


truly,

Rennick

In response to this review we wrote

To: J-Sin

Hey J-Sin,

Thanks for reviewing the Disposable Thumbs EP! I'm really glad that you enjoyed it.

Rock well,
Zach L.

In response to this review we wrote

To: J-Sin

[Editor's note: a lot of banter between me and this guy have gone back and forth. Read the review for yourself and try to figure out why he's so bent. So sit back and enjoy a rather long thread...]

John William Gordon wrote:

Thanks for the review.

However, the reviewer embarrasses himself or herself by stating my CD is
free jazz or jam jazz. He or she should bone up on what "free jazz" is,
since it's clear he or she doesn't have a clue (Derek Baily is free jazz).

In fact, my bass player, Jeff Chambers (played with Dizzy Gillespie, Freddie
Hubbard, Al Jareau and others) said he would not do the project if it was
free jazz or free form or jam jazz.

Almost all the bass lines are written out, along with the melodies, plus all
solos occur over strict chord changes. This isn't the case in free jazz or
jam jazz.


There isn't a free form or free jazz tune on the CD:

Tune #1 (Harm Alarm): written-out bass lines and melody within AABA form;
solos change between melodic minor F and E (A section); the bridge (B
section) F diminished, E dim, Eb dim, D min (same as F). (10 bar A and B
sections)

Tune #2 (Distillery): written-out bass line and melody within AABA form: the
harmony is the same as Dizzy Gillespie's "BeBop" tune (half-bar shifts
between F minor & E diminished in the A Section; the bridge (B section) has
two II-V-I progressions).

Tune #3 (Quidnunc Mo): strictly written head, including melody and bass
line; solo section sounds free formy but changes between G and Ab whole tone
with overlapping theme based on 5 notes (B, Bb, Ab, A, and Ab). This solo
section has jam section feel to it, granted.

Tune #4 (Folly Stroll): completely written bass line the whole way through;
completely written melody; form is strict AABA; the A section uses a derived
scale shifting every two bars; the bridge is Bb minor, B minor, C minor, B
minor -- all over Ab and Eb.

Tune #5 (6 Las): completely written out bass line and melody on AABA form;
solo section on compressed A section (F7,C7,Bb7,F7 then Bb7,F7,G7,A7 with
tritone subs on every chord).

Tune #6 (Bamboozelama): not a free-form tune, but a 12-bar jazz blues; the
bass line is only written out on the head, then the bassist simply walks on
12-bar blues. Hardly free jazz.

Tune #7 (Ripper Snapper): a blues basically, but 24 bars -- the bass line
is completley written out the whole way, the melody is written out, the
solos happen over G for the I chord, then C for the IV chord, then Ab
(tritone sub of D) for the V chord. Free jazz or free form? Nope (again).

Tune #8 (Belly's Bounce): a bebop head written out over an AABA tune; the A
sections is in 4/4 and the B in 3/4 latin bridge; the harmony is shifting
very fast and is all written out, not jam jazz or free jazz. There is
indeed a short jam section coming out of the bass solo where the bassist
vamps until a queue, but the harmony is strict otherwise and not even close
to being free or jam jazz.

Tune #9 (That Old Dream): an AABB tune with written bass line and melody;
the bassist solos in the beginning.

Thanks for the review, but I'd at least expect a "bad" review to refer to
the quality of the music and not the review itself.

-John William Gordon

[followed by: ]

One more thing. The sarcasm of the reviewer regarding the use of my middle
name is uncalled for. I've never used my middle name before this project,
but there is another "John Gordon" in the U.S. -- he's a sax player who
recorded his own album with John Scofield, a jazz guitarist -- and another
"John Gordon" jazz guitarist in U.K. who's recorded. I wrote that I use my
middle name to avoid confusion.

-John

PS Say, what is your name, little one?

[and my response:]

http://www.google.com/search?q=define%3Amature&start=0&ie=utf-8&oe=utf-8&client=firefox-a&rls=org.mozilla:en-US:official

I think that'll help clear things up for you...out

J-Sin / editor @
Smother Magazine
www.smother.net

[and his reply:]

Nice reply. Thanks for adressing my specific points in the mature fashion
you aspire to.

I addressed very specific major flaws in your review and you think by
referring to the word, "mature," you somehow rise above the fray without
addressing or correcting a single point.

Again, my points were very specific. That is what maturity is, little one.
You're clearly an oily squid just out of high school.

Stick to reviewing what you have a clue about:
3-chord rock and Britney Spears.

-Piece out (:)),
John

[and my response:]

my reply Re: maturity was in regard to the email in which you called me "little one", which I'm not sure what that is supposed to be a slight on...my height? my weight? my age? (older than high school and college, and I've been running a magazine for almost a decade now)...regardless when you say things like:

"Again, my points were very specific. That is what maturity is, little one.
You're clearly an oily squid just out of high school.

Stick to reviewing what you have a clue about:
3-chord rock and Britney Spears.

-Piece out (:)),"

why would I waste my time addressing anything else you wrote?...does this type of correspondence typically get you far?...I would imagine that someone who wants to make it at any level in the music industry wouldn't spend his days insulting a magazine that was kind enough to review him in the first place...out

J-Sin / editor @
Smother Magazine
www.smother.net

[and his response:]

OK, well thanks for actually communicating. Your tone ticked me off,
especially the sacarstic part about my middle name you wrote in the review.
"Little one" incorrectly referred to your age, since I thought the reviewer
was just out of high school.

Here's why you should have replied intelligently: If you're going to
publically get sacarstic about me using my middle name plus publically
mis-classify my music, then, on top of that, completely blow off my specific
privately communicated points just because I wrote "little one," maybe you
should quit the review business. If you go public with something, be
prepared to defend it.

Regarding the music business, I'm not a schmaltzy faux-punker show-bizzy
ass-kisser, and if someone gets sarcastic and gets major facts wrong, I'm
going to speak up loudly, and I don't give a rat's ass what it will do for
my music career (ironically, the so-called rebel world of rock is full of
glamour pussies). If you had written that you actually didn't like the
music, that'd be fine with me. Your review's smart-assy non-musical aspects
(re name) and blithe misclassification, though, warranted a reply, and
warrant revision or deletion.

-John

[and my reply:]


John Gordon wrote:

> OK, well thanks for actually communicating. Your tone ticked me off,
> especially the sacarstic part about my middle name you wrote in the review.
> "Little one" incorrectly referred to your age, since I thought the reviewer
> was just out of high school.


seems pretty ridiculous to assume that...


>
> Here's why you should have replied intelligently: If you're going to
> publically get sacarstic about me using my middle name plus publically
> mis-classify my music, then, on top of that, completely blow off my specific
> privately communicated points just because I wrote "little one," maybe you
> should quit the review business. If you go public with something, be
> prepared to defend it.
>

with all of the email and work I do all day, why would I "defend" a review that is my opinion after all?...


> Regarding the music business, I'm not a schmaltzy faux-punker show-bizzy
> ass-kisser, and if someone gets sarcastic and gets major facts wrong, I'm
> going to speak up loudly, and I don't give a rat's ass what it will do for
> my music career (ironically, the so-called rebel world of rock is full of
> glamour pussies). If you had written that you actually didn't like the
> music, that'd be fine with me. Your review's smart-assy non-musical aspects
> (re name) and blithe misclassification, though, warranted a reply, and
> warrant revision or deletion.
>
> -John
>

I'm certain that you would say the same thing to Rolling Stone or any major publication...that is, IF they took the time to review your music and even listen to it...look, it's okay that you disagree with me and you feel slighted because I didn't go ga-ga over your music...I wouldn't say that my tone was "sarcastic" re: your middle name...I said that was "fair enough"...you felt it was important enough to mention in your press sheet, so that's why I repeated it...in fact I wouldn't say that my review was negative at all...I *thought* that your music sounded somewhat improvisitional, hence why I said that it had that "FEEL"...for you to list out all the various reasons in which your music is so vastly different than free-form jazz just felt boisterous and I let you vent what you needed to do...I just feel that your slam on me came out of nowhere...I complemented your music and while you may feel that I misrepresented your genre it wasn't like I said it was crap and/or called it something like hip-hop or country or something...but to each their own...good luck with your music...and please read our FAQ about reviews and deletion...out

J-Sin / editor @
Smother Magazine
www.smother.net

[and his response:]

I read on your website that you started the site right after high school.
That, coupled with your opinion's ill-informed comments gave weight to the
idea you're just out of high school. I figured the whole web has only been
going full-bore about 10 years, then guessed you'd been at it perhaps 5
years, which put you freshly out of high school (5 years).

You haven't defended anything. All you've done is avoid that in a manner
worthy of a Bush press conference.

And like Bush, I don't think you can, frankly, defend your position -- not
because you're incapable in general -- but because in this case the specific
defects I pointed out are untenable:

(1) music misclassification (e.g., like calling the Sex Pistols "heavy
metal," an analogous inaccurate comment that perhaps a jazz critic might
make)
and
(2) jejune, uncalled for sarcasm regarding a non-musical point (e.g., the
request to use my middle name so not confuse people who might search the web
for "John Gordon" and mistakingly find the sax player who record with
Scofield).

In all your malnorished replies, you have only defended your right to be
ignore my points.

-John

FYI, while we've been keeping this idiotic thread of ours going (and kudos
to you for wasting time on it like me), I received notice that two other
radio stations are playing my CD:

">John,

>>
>>...It is also rare to receive a CD so vibrant and compelling. From
>>the first few notes I knew I had found something good.
>>Your album has been added to our playlist, where it will chart in our top

30.

>>This week it is number 1 on our jazz chart, and I have gotten "cool
>>album"'s from non-jazz DJs. The cover art is great. I think you nailed
>>this one. Are you looking for label representation? May I suggest
>>getting in touch with Neal Weiss (my father) at Whaling City Sound or
>>Andy McWain at Fuller Street Music? These two east coast labels strive
>>for and acheive the quality and originality that you exemplify. Thanks
>>for sending your disc my way.
>>
>>Ben
>>
>>Benjamin Weiss
>>Jazz Director
>>KBGA College Radio


And

"I used to DJ at a college radio station here in Tallahassee and will
occasionally do the Blues or Jazz show. I did the Blues show with my friend
yesterday, and I asked him what was new and he played me your cd. I really
dug it. ...I wanted to let you know I liked the album. I play Jazz Guitar as
well. So I thought it was cool.
Keep Swingin!
Cale"

[and my response:]

clearly you have the moral high ground here...trying to insult someone
because of their age (which is amusing since you are far from coming close
to right which according to you, is quite simply the worse sin
imaginable) over such nonsensical and something so completely misinterpreted
as your precious middle name, which again, YOU put an explanation for on
YOUR biosheet, if you felt it completely unimportant you wouldn't have
mentioned it, you did, so I said it was fair enough that you mentioned
it...jeez you really do have some wacked out anger issues...your lame
attempts at trying to bully me into doing, what exactly, I don't know...but
I do know that someone as completely unprofessional as yourself better cling
onto what good praise they do receive, since if my review was sooooo
negative, I'd really hate to see what would happen if someone really
actually DID give you a negative review...lame, my man, very very lame...I
seriously think you need to see someone about your anger issues...out

J-Sin / editor @
Smother Magazine
www.smother.net

[and his response:]

Ooo, I seemed to touch a nerve....

You STILL haven't addressed any points, and I don't expect you too,
President Bush.

Instead, just like Bush, you keep the discussion away from actual points and
instead talk about "patriotism" or "character flaws" -- anything but
addressing the points, which you've never done.

"One little" phrase and you call that "bullying?"

Anyway, you can have the last word. I'm not going to respond to your next
non-response.

[and my final reply:]

clearly you have the moral high ground here...trying to insult someone because of their age (which is amusing since you are far from coming close to right which according to you, is quite simply the worse sin imaginable) over such nonsensical and something so completely misinterpreted as your precious middle name, which again, YOU put an explanation for on YOUR biosheet, if you felt it completely unimportant you wouldn't have mentioned it, you did, so I said it was fair enough that you mentioned it...jeez you really do have some wacked out anger issues...your lame attempts at trying to bully me into doing, what exactly, I don't know...but I do know that someone as completely unprofessional as yourself better cling onto what good praise they do receive, since if my review was sooooo negative, I'd really hate to see what would happen if someone really actually DID give you a negative review...lame, my man, very very lame...I seriously think you need to see someone about your anger issues...out

J-Sin / editor @
Smother Magazine
www.smother.net

In response to this review we wrote